Navigating Mom Guilt

Dear mothers, we’re here to discuss that nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach. Or maybe it’s a little voice in the back of your mind telling you that you are not enough. This, dear Mamas, is Mom Guilt.

First and foremost, it’s totally normal to feel this way. So don’t be so down and out about yourself. Being a mom is a tough life, and the world puts immense pressure on us to maintain that picture-perfect image of motherhood. As a result, those feelings of inadequacy, guilt, and judgment can creep in; you might find yourself becoming increasingly critical that you’re not doing enough – or even being enough – for your children.

So how can we navigate through those feelings?

  • Flip the script: We’re so quick to focus on what we’re not doing right but it’s important to take a step back and recognize all that we are doing well. Count your wins, instead of focusing on what you could be doing better. Transform the way you think about situations. So rather than viewing it as: “I should spend less time working”, consider it as: “My children are learning from me how to balance work and home life.” Remember that we are our own worst critics, so chances are: you’re the only one that doesn’t see how well you’re doing.

 

  • Practice self-love: Show the same sympathy and compassion to yourself that you would to a close friend, or a loved one. Remember that you’re doing the best you can with the resources you have. When you practice self-compassion and acceptance, it creates room for forgiveness, opens up opportunities for personal growth, and allows you to unapologetically love yourself.

 

  • Take a break: We know it’s hard to find time out as a mother. But ironically, that’s when you need it more than ever. Before you can take care of the world, we firmly believe you need to take care of yourself first. So don’t leave “you time” to chance; take control of your own needs, and carve out some well-deserved time to do whatever it is you please. It could be yoga, a languorous bath*, a long walk, a book club, or even just a big glass of wine. Being able to recharge will make you more emotionally available for your children.
    *We recommend taking a relaxing bath with our SOAK Indulgent Bath Salts.

 

  • Talk it out: Connecting with other moms can make a huge difference. It’s highly unlikely that you’re going through this alone so chat with some fellow mamas, vent about your struggles, and support each other. Communication is such a powerful tool. Remember, no one is a mind reader, so try not to assume that your needs are obvious to those around you. You’re not alone in feeling guilty or overwhelmed.

 

  • Let go of perfection: Striving for perfection will only lead to more feelings of guilt and inadequacy. Stop trying to be the picture of “perfection” because we’re here to share a little secret with you: it doesn’t exist. Start unfollowing “supermoms” on social media and being reframing your thoughts on what it means to be a good mom. Embrace your imperfections and know that your children want a happy, present mother, not a “perfect” one.

 

  • Prioritize mental health: When kept to yourself, mom guilt can feel very isolating and lead to even more mental health problems, so it’s important to seek help if you start feeling overwhelmed.

 

Let’s take a moment to appreciate all that you do for your kids, and the loved ones in your life. Let go of the idea of perfection, and embrace your own journey of motherhood.